33 week dr's update

So It's friday and I have had all of my pregnancy appointments for the week. Yesterday's OB appointment and NST went well. Baby was sleeping at first so Dr. MacDonald gave me some M&Ms to wake him up. It did the trick. He squirmed away after that and everything checked out fine. Dr. MacDonald and I discussed the birth a little and we are definite that he will be delivered around 39 weeks one way or another. We want to wait and see what his weight and size looks like around 36 weeks to make our final decision. In all honesty I really think this will end in a c-section and I would be ok with that decision. I ultimately want what is best for the baby and me and that could be the best route. The MFM I saw today is already sold on a c-section so I might walk into my OB appointment Tuesday with Dr. MacDonald having already decided a c-section is best. He was measuring big, around 6lbs 10oz, which is in the 78th percentile. Not massive, but a bit big for his gestation.

The diabetes has been almost under control for a while. My diet is good and all of my post meal numbers are good. The only number that isn't is the fasting number. This means it is not diet induced and is instead due to hormones. I will be increasing my insulin daily until we reach a dosage that can control the fasting number.

One thing I want to sort of gripe about is people's attitude towards this whole situation. First, Cailin was a big baby and had shoulder dystocia which already means I am at risk of having a big baby again. She was perfectly healthy and I did not have GD. I have a longer than average torso so naturally Cailin was big. Dan was a big baby as well. Second, I do not have GD because I eat crap all day. A typical days food consists of yogurt, eggs, salad, chicken, and veggies. I don't eat sweets. I don't eat processed foods. I only eat proteins and healthy veggies. I am overweight I know, but that does not cause diabetes. Third, the GD is being caused by a medication I am on for Colitis. I was not on this medication when I was pregnant with Cailin. Unfortunately when I was around 15 weeks pregnant they discontinued the medication I was on, I tried going on through the pregnancy without medication but that didn't go well. I tried another pregnancy and breastfeeding safe medication but it gave me a terrible headache. My doctor didn;t want to fool around with medications while I was pregnant so she put me on this current medication when I was around 22 weeks pregnant. It works and is safe for the baby too. I can take it during pregnancy but once I deliver I will be experimenting with other drugs to find one that works that I can take long term. This mean I cannot breastfeed. Again, not my decision.

All of this adds up to me having GD and not being able to breastfeed. I know breast is best and that is why Cailin was breastfed for 4 months. Some of my friends and family act like I am causing all of this. I am not. I cannot willfully control my colitis and I cannot control the gestational diabetes. When I tell people that I have GD they often tell me I need to watch my diet. I know I do, and I am. I am also guilty of looking at people and thinking that diabetes is caused excluseively by poor diet, but its not. There are several factors and when it comes down to it, anyone can get it. If I had my way I wouldn't be living with Colitis and I wouldn't put my baby at risk and have GD. This things are not my fault, and I know that whole heartedly, but I can't help but get upset when people act like I am doing this to myself. Luckily my doctors know the background and that I am not at the root of these problems. My friends and family need to follow. I don;t want a c-section, I dont want to have colitis, and I don;t want GD.